Sometimes I’m Crazy November 9, 2025
Stupid Crazy…
Okay, let me set the scene for you. It’s early morning. Master has just informed me that A) Workmen are coming and B) We’re leaving right away for shopping, breakfast, and just general hanging out. I’m given 20 minutes to get ready and 10 minutes to take care of whatever it is I want to get done in the house. This is not nearly enough time, but I pick up the floor quickly and pray that we’ll get back before the workmen show up. So we go do our errands, have breakfast and then drive home. The whole drive home, I’ve got my fingers crossed that the workmen won’t be there because I have this thing about having a perfectly organized house that Martha Stewart would envy and if anyone should ever see the house when it’s messy with dog toys, blankets, and books strewn about, well, I think I might die.
When we arrive home, my worst fears are realized when the Workmen are waiting in the yard for us to open the front door. I’m mortified. IT shows on my face. Master can see it. I beg him and I do mean BEG HIM to PLEEAASE go stall them for a few minutes.. just five minutes. So Master gives me his house keys and grants me my 5 minute stall. I run inside and begin picking up the floor and folding blankets and throwing dog toys into the dog toy box (yes, the dog has that many toys that he has his own toy box.. he’s our “son” for all intents and purposes.. What do you expect?) Anyway, my five minutes is tick tick ticking away and something comes over me. I think it might have been pride. I don’t know but whatever it was, it made me do the unthinkable.
I LOCKED MASTER OUT OF THE HOUSE!!!!!!!
Yes, well, in my mind, I was locking the WORKMEN out of the house, but in reality, yes, I locked my Master out of his own house so that I could finish cleaning. I heard him knocking on the door, but I ignored it. Then I heard him BANGING on the door… and I turned on vacuum cleaner so that I couldn’t hear him banging and so that I could I finish up the cleaning. About 10 minutes later, I sheepishly opened the front door. I smiled as sweetly as I could into Master’s angry red face and petted him on the bulging vein in his forehead. He didn’t say a word to me. He just looked at me and I knew I was in trouble.
SO he stared me down and then said “Kitten… what are you doing?” I said “cleaning, Master”… “Kitten? Why did you lock me out OF MY OWN HOUSE??” I said “because I needed to clean the house before the workmen came in and then I was thinking that maybe I could just clean the house really fast and.. and.. and..” Then he said “KITTEN.. if you had OPENED THE DOOR WHEN I TOLD YOU… you would have known that THE WORKMEN WERE NOT COMING IN because he problem was not in the HOUSE it was ON THE STREET!!!!!”
DOH!!! I looked like an idiot, I put my Master into an embarrassing position as workers looked on and he couldn’t get into his own house, and of course, well, I LOCKED my Owner out of his own house.. lest we forget that one.
Well, punishment was that I wasn’t allowed to clean the house for 4 days. Tonight is the first day I’m allowed to clean and I cannot wait to get at it. But listen ladies. No matter how clean you want your home for your Master, make sure it’s for him you’re doing it. I’m pretty sure I was trying to exert some control over the situation in Master’s home and that’s why I went as far as I did. Now I’ve learned a lesson. Wow..
And now I’m going to get back to cleaning.
Oh my, you poor thing, you have the cleaning bug bad! Sometimes I wish I had that… And I shouldn’t laugh, but you locked him out… OMG… I’m having a giggle-fit.
Christine
LOL
Yes, I locked him out. I can’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it when I did it. I felt myself doing it, saw myself doing it, and then I couldn’t stop myself. OMG.. yes, I locked him out of the house.
Never never again (I hope) never never again…(hopefully).
omg, that is about the funniest thing i ever read; i can just picture you in there cleaning like a mad woman, Master outside veins-a-popping! Too funny! Thank you for sharing that and making me laugh.
dk