Saturday, January 08, 2005
Cabin Fever
Last night, I really fail to see how Master put up with me, but he did. One day, I’m thinking he’s going to stop putting up with my silly little tantrums and spoiled attitude and just take the collar off indefinitely. I’ve got to learn how to take a deep breath on these little things that get me into trouble with him.
I’m used to having the house to myself, honestly and having Master here for nearly three weeks without a break has been taxing. I’m way off schedule on everything and nothing seems to be going right. Well, by right, I mean “my way”, which is wrong I guess in the scheme of things since being owned means “my way” is His way and his way is the right way.
So anyway, last night, I got my desire to work back again and for the first time in MONTHS I was working on my stuff and feeling inspired. I was actually getting my comissions done. I was actually putting things together, designing things, and feeling very productive. I’m click click clicking right along and Master says “put your work away and watch this movie with me.” Now in my head, I’m saying “WHAT????!” because he knows I’ve been creatively blocked for about three months and this is the first time in all that time that I’ve actually come close to finishing a piece. I put the materials up and started watching the movie with him, then as usual, I promptly fell asleep with my head on his tummy.
When I woke up, he was ready to go out to dinner so I got dressed. I looked at the clock and it was nearly midnight which meant my desire to eat healthier foods was all but thwarted because only diners and IHOP were open. I decided not to eat, to just have water and there in lies the error.
Master demanded that I eat because he knew I was hungry. He made me order something and then made me eat it and all the while I pouted because it felt like to me nothing that had been important to both of us about my life outside of him (my work, my desire to eat a healthier diet, etc) was counting for much anymore. So I pouted. I hemmed and hawed. I grunted. I glared. I was terribly put out about all of this. And really, I had no right to be. It’s what I signed on for.
So we had to go shopping after that and the shopping broke the tension a bit. We talked about it and I told him why I was so upset. I didn’t get punished, barely got out of that, though I should have been punished with more than an essay. When we got home, Master and I played video games and watched DVDs until I fell asleep, again, on his tummy. We slept apart.
I got the message.
I wonder if the message will stick.
Idunna's Day to Day • The Way I Feel • (0) Comments • (0) Trackbacks • Permalink
Tuesday, January 04, 2005
Breaking Speed Limits on I-85
Master and I were headed home from Atlanta the two nights ago and boredom on the expressway got the better of us. I was given the command of “skirt up” and with his free hand, Master began spanking my thighs harder than I think he ever had. I was biting back tears but loving it just the same. Odd to see me, the girl who used to never wear anything shorter than ankle length with my *mini*skirt pulled up and my thighs spread open happily digging my toes into the dashboard for stability. It’s safe to say that Master has done away with the modest-mouse.
The spanking was loud and painful. The blows were sharp and I felt raised marks almost right away. My skin was red and I was sure that the spanking would leave bruises to remember it by on the next day. I began to climax almost immediately as I’m turning into quite the pain slut. Next came the begging.. begging for mercy.. begging him to stop, not to stop, everything in between but mostly begging him to touch me. He did.. Hard.. he spanked my flower harder than he ever has, fast, repetitive, merciless blows against the most tender and newly shaven flesh. I climaxed again, begging him not to stop. But of course, he did stop. He liked the soft urgency in my voice when I begged him and he made me beg him for about a two mile stretch. I begged for anything, just a touch.. just for him to hold my hand.
Eventually, Master rewarded me with teasing. He teased me with the new toy he’d just bought for me. A vibrating gyrator with graduated rings and a bulbous tip. First, he only gave me the tip, then in time a few inches, then all at once, every inch and as fast and hard as he could. He broke speed limits and pushed me past all my pleasure thresholds. I think pleasure and pain blurred and I was on fire for him. Thrashing, Screaming, Begging again and again and then the tears came. I cried because the pleasure was so immense. I was completely out of control and pushed to the edge of and then immediately past previous limits.
He was happy that I took the pleasure so well. When we got home, I was still unquenched and he used me until I was too tired to move. Even after that I begged to please him and eventually he let me. When he was satisfied, I was allowed to shower and wash my hair. Then Master gave me cuddle time until as usual, I fell asleep with my head on his belly and his hands stroking my hair.
I used to fear being pushed too far because I didn’t like the idea of someone else controlling my pleasure and pain so completely but recently, Master has erased that fear or at least loosed the anchor of it. I don’t fear what he can give me or what he can take from me emotionally and physically anymore. I just want to be a pleasure to him and give him the best parts of myself. I never thought I’d be pushed over a limit while riding down I-85, but Master promised to always keep me wondering about what he might do next.
Life's Little Apples • Apple Juice! • (0) Comments • (0) Trackbacks • Permalink